I really don’t like mooching at all. It’s such a different existence. You don’t have a say in anything. Living with relatives is absolutely a difficult task. It’s a project. You must learn to ignore all the oddities that drive you insane. You must ignore things you would not put up with for a second. Most of all you are in a different home, and living with their rules. You don’t have a personal restreat. When the day has you down, you can’t do anything.

Well, you could always take to the streets. Just drive around. Just part in random parking lots and kill stime. And that is just what I did today. I was having a down day. After one too many unmet expectations from family, I needed time and space to sort things out. To let the feeling air out. To let the emotions breathe a little and to just let off some steam doing anything that would help. At home, this means close the door and play guitar, listen to some bands, watch some show, watch some movie, sutf the web, sleep or anything else…. But here, there’s not such freedom.

So I just drove around for a while. Then went to Jack in the Box. Then went to Barnes and Noble. Browsed thru books. Then thru the Music section. Then thru DVDs. Saw the boxsets of all the “I Love Lucy” seasons. Then went to the financial section. Found an investing book. Sat down and read the book. Kept the phone on silent. Expected more calls from some, but didn’t get those. It’s definitely a good feeling to not have anyone want to look for you when you go AWOL. Oh, well, we don’t all need support.

Looking at the last few posts, and judging by my own feeling the last few days, it’s just been a long rant. That’s to say, I gotta jet. Leave this place. It’s not the cool fun, I had expected it to be. Santa Monica has apartments for $1400 for studios and higher. Most studios are starting at $2000 and go to $5000 or higher. I don’t make that much per month! The $1400 sounded reasonable for one month, but they don’t do less than a 12 month lease. And they don’t have any vacancies. Los Angeles, is also it’s little world. I don’t know what to do. Maybe need to look for families renting rooms….

Most probably will bail on this entire area. Probably even Cali. The time… she will tell